July 29, 2010

  • Cause & Effect

    A long time ago I was taught that for every cause, there was an effect.

    This actually works, as long as all we use as reference are physics and chemistry. Once we delve into the mind and social interactions all previous bets are off.

    I didn't understand the difference until just over six years ago myself, and it was not a pleasant awakening. Once I did see, it took me a few years to realize what it meant to me, and how it could affect my life. I don't think it's one of those sudden epiphany kind of things that change everything in an instant. What I'm getting to is our ability to choose how things in our lives will affect us.

    I know I've seen certain people in my life that never seemed to be out of control, they had this ability to take whatever happened and turn it their use, in some way. I'm sure you've seen these people too, there are plenty of them out there. It always seemed as if they couldn't be bothered by the simple fact that things happen, both good and bad.

    My own epiphany came early on a mid March morning in 2004. At the time, all I knew was it was important, I didn't see how it would change me, or how my life would change because of it. The truth is, I don't think the changes have stopped either. At least I hope they haven't.

    The thing is...

    Things happen in our lives. Some of it is a direct result of the choices we make in our lives, but far more is simply out of our control. We can't "make" people do or say things that will always help us. Our lives are disrupted by things we cannot foresee. The actions of people we've never met, possibly don't even know exist, do change our lives. A job can be lost, a car wrecked, a disaster can strike, a missed connection can change all our plans... there is so much of what happens we have little or no control over.

    And then of course, are the people we know who seem to go out of their way to make our lives harder, who seem to have malicious designs that they delight in dropping at our feet every chance they get.

    No, we can't control those things.

    What is in our control though, is what we do about them.

     

    and that, is the epiphany. That is what saved my life. That is why I am here now. It's also why I think I will always have to be careful, because it's far easier to let myself fall back into being the victim, to allow all those things that happen control how I think and react.

     

     

     

    It's said that man has free will. It can be argued either way. Even if we are as much a product of our upbringing and the programing of our genes as some may think, the informed mind can do the unexpected. And I for one, like being unpredictable, at times...

     

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